So you understand that its not gonna happen,right? NOPE.NO WAY.NO HOW. Well it could happen but its gonna take a little effort on your part.Best Buy only stocked  10 of those 589 dollar jvcboomosonic 46 inch flat screens that you wanna put in your section 8 apartment.Its okay.Life has dealt you a raw deal and you only contribute to me thinking life’s fucking psychic and knew just what to expect or not expect from you.Youre a 16th placer 11th on a really good day.10th placer no Goddamn way.I honestly dont know how this is gonna work out for you.But im chock full o’ ideas about it.

1. You make it in line on time(yea right )and your 17 two year old kids whos grandma couldnt watch because she was out partying last night get you kicked out of the store just as youre about to be rang up.
2. You get fingered for the robbery you and the homies did last year of the store(justice served up black friday style)
3. you come to your senses and go to work on time instead of calling out because they wouldnt give you the day off
4. You get the tv and saturday morning comcast comes a calling because money spent on tv was actually the bill money.

I actually dont know shit about shit .so good black friday.may the lord bestow upon you all the things you can’t really afford on sale or not.AMEN.

Get your ass up and go see the fucking parade.Its gonna be great. Big heads floating in the sky way above where you and Jesus walk. A wide assortment of characters.Some big ,some small all full of hot air.Im talking about the family parade idiot.Let uncle junebug know that its not an accomplishment getting out of jail and although they didnt get along very well when they were married reminded aunt karen and uncle pete that no matter what the courts say each one is entitled to they are both quitters and losers. Please for the love of all thats holy and if you’re a hoodrat for the love of ray j. kick the shit out of those bad ass kids under the table.I like to whisper shit like “No one loves you”"Youre adopted” to those real bad ones and look mystified as all fuck when they tell their parents.Rememember to call them snitches too after they tell.Basicallly today will be full of bullshit with a buffet  on the side.Watch your plate or you’ll be feasting on b.s all day.

Its Thanksgiving.You know what im thankful for? HANDS. Go fuck yourself!  Enjoy the holiday.

Days going super for you? Didnt think so.People in the office getting on your nerves? Stay at how mom(by stay at home i mean unemployed wench with a title)?Drug dealer and the corners not treating you right? Doesnt really matter who the fuck you are and what you do or more than likely dont do with your lazy time to read a blog ass.I want you to trip someone.Not down stairs or anything cruel like that. A normal trip up.Need an example? Gotcha –

HER: weathers nice today. not to cold not to hot,i could enjoy everyday if it felt like this.Dont you agree?

YOU:<*under your breath quickly* Id fuck you if youd keep the bag on your head  OR *under your breath quickly*you know i been fuckin your man for the past month,(any variation of fowl** ass shit will work)  Yea I love days like this

HER : Excuse me

You: i said I love days like this

This is gonna have that person tripped up for the entire day.They heard what you said.They just dont wanna believe they did or better yet they dont wanna believe its true.

Another win for you today with the emotional/mind fuck trip up

** i know the word is foul but i mean it in a way to describe some ol chicken head type shit

So you woke up this morning,hooray. only thing that would probably be better is if you woke up 10 x’s awesomer.Cant win em all.Today i want you to find someone ,someone who is better than you.Dont give me that no-one is better than me bullshit either.You know who this person is.If your having trouble identifying said person look down .See that?yea that .The motha fucker whose dick you’re hoping on every chance you get…thats the person.Today i want you to hop off that shit and bitch just breathe and be free.